Soooooo

Today has been a long day for me. Hell, it's been a long day all week. There were applications filled out, turned in and for hubby a few interviews and some added hours at the part time job. But no new employment has been seen. bummers. I got to see my little man today and found out that he is doing great......i am happy to report that he is off all meds and the bags under his eyes are gone (i think in part due to he now has glasses) He looks so much older and handsome let me tell ya!! I keep finding it more and more obvious that my marriage is in a odd stage that not even I can manage to understand where it will go. He (hubby)did however tell me I can go to rally if I can get it together to go....apparently he knows how important rally is to me. I went into the mall today......baby girl's first time in the mall and I must say those over sized sun glasses I usually view to be kinda tacky (but are apparently the "in" thing) look great on her lol. I found lots of things I want and even found out a store my twig of a sister shops in is now carrying my fat size......I really REALLY want a job now!!! lol. I was actually eyeing some things at wal mart the other day too and said well, damn they really aren't helping with the initiative to lose weight.....they're all just making the clothes bigger. *sigh* oh well......health and well being should be good enough I suppose lol. I am still trying to figure out how I keep gaining slowly but steadily......the last time I discussed this with the Dr. (the ones I think are out to kill me lol) they're reply was "are you pregnant". Not sure I would be concerned about gaining weight if I was. And of course they ran yet another thyroid check......none of them ever come back telling them what they wanna see. So I keep gaining weight. arg. It would help if I didn't lose my breath before I even get my heart rate up......I was wrestling my hubby in a tickle war last night and was out of breath....checked the pulse....I might as well been watchin tv. grrr. I guess I will just keep trying...someday I'll get it right.